


This Is It

by costia_gray



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Afterlife, Bittersweet Ending, Canon Compliant, F/F, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Season/Series 05, Vignette
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-10
Updated: 2019-06-10
Packaged: 2020-04-24 01:41:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19163212
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/costia_gray/pseuds/costia_gray
Summary: “So… this is it?”Lexa nods, smiles. “This is it.”(A small afterlife vignette following Clarke's "death" in season 5.)





	This Is It

**Author's Note:**

  * For [lexa_woods](https://archiveofourown.org/users/lexa_woods/gifts).



> Just a short, bittersweet story for my girl while she's recovering from surgery. <3 It was intended to be much fluffier, but, well, this is what happened. Enjoy. :)

When the end finally comes, Clarke tries to fight. She’s spent years — nearly a decade to her memory, hundreds more kept in stasis on board _Eligius IV_ on course to the only habitable planet they could find — fighting to find peace. For herself, for Madi, for her people. So, of course she fights. But the end comes anyway. Her vision fades and her ears ring and it’s over. There’s nothing left but darkness.

And she’s _relieved_.

No matter where they went, no matter how well she meant, no matter what she went through to help her people, she could never win. She never made the right decision for everyone. She never made a choice that wasn’t criticized, that was seen for the good intentions she held. She never wanted to be the hero — she wasn’t that naive. But she’d never meant to be the villain she was painted out to be. She’d only ever wanted to do the right thing.

Of course she’s relieved. The pressure is finally off. She can be at peace, unburdened by the weight of her people’s judgement and criticism.

Eventually, her eyes begin to see again. She wonders if she should be fearful — maybe they never really killed her, maybe she’s still there at Sanctum, maybe this was all some strangely intense nightmare. But that couldn’t be, not when she’s hit with this wave of tranquility, the likes of which she’s never felt before.

She’s looking up at a cloudless blue sky. There’s a gentle, warm breeze blowing across her face, and she can feel the grass beneath her bare arms. She raises her hands in front of her face, surprised to find they’re real. She’s real. Somehow, she didn’t expect that. She’s not really sure _what_ she expected, but it isn’t this.

“Clarke.”

The voice makes Clarke’s heart begin to race, and she sits up so quickly her head spins. When her eyes find the source of the voice she’s so missed, her eyes well up with tears.

“ _Lexa._ ”

It’s been so long since she saw the last true commander in the City of Light. She used to worry that her memory was failing her when she drew her lover’s face in her sketchbooks. But she’s happy to see her memories have held up. Lexa looks exactly how she did the last time Clarke saw her alive.

Lexa’s hands reach out for hers, and Clarke marvels at how familiar the calloused touch feels. She shifts as close as she can possibly get, pulling her hands from Lexa’s only to clasp them against her soft cheeks instead.

“I’ve missed you so much,” she says, her voice shaking with emotion. Every day since she lost her — this beautiful, magnificent woman who loved her and supported her without judgement, determined to repent for a messy past — she’s wished to see her again. To talk to her, touch her, kiss her. She wished for more time.

Now, she supposes, they have all the time in the world.

“I’ve been with you every step of the way,” Lexa tells her, green eyes bright with sincerity. “I am so proud of you, Clarke. You never stopped fighting.”

Clarke kisses her then, soft and slow, and Lexa’s hands slide down her neck to grip her shoulders as she reciprocates.

“ _Yu gonplei ste odon, niron_ ,” she whispers. That’s when the tears spill and Clarke’s chest feels like it’s collapsing. She’s gone. She’s really, truly gone.

Lexa soothes her while she cries, gathers her close and rubs soft circles against her back. It helps Clarke start to calm again as she comes to grips with her bittersweet fate.

“Madi?” she asks softly when she’s recovered enough of her voice to speak. If there is one person she regrets leaving behind, it is the girl who has become her daughter.

“Madi is a strong _goufa_. You raised her well,” Lexa assures her with an achingly tender smile. “She is a wonderful choice for Heda. She will put those skills to good use in the days to come.”

It’s ominous, a bit, but given the manner in which she died, it isn’t terribly surprising. She can only hope Madi is stronger and smarter than her. She hopes those leadership skills serve her well and unite their people once and for all.

She won’t be holding her breath.

“So… this is it?”

Lexa nods, smiles. “This is it.”

Clarke nods too, quiet for a moment as Lexa’s fingers draw different shapes across her back.

“What’s next?”

Lexa smiles again, getting to her feet first before guiding Clarke to follow. Clarke thinks she’s seen Lexa smile more in this brief time they’ve shared together than the entirety of the time they knew each other in life. That has to be a good sign, right?

“Let me show you.” She laces her fingers through Clarke’s, leading her off along a small dirt path. Clarke nods, trusting her, and falls into step beside her.

For the first time in nearly a decade, Clarke feels free.


End file.
